Seriously What Are Feelings?

I have done some things I probably shouldn't have.. But Idk.. I learnt something from it.. I thought I had those kind of feelings for a certain someone but I dont I mean I love them yea but not in the way I thought.. Maybe I am over them :)

Feeling lost now aye. Like everything I thought, has just gone down the drain. I mean this feeling isn't all bad. I have found my true feelings for someone. And I reckon thats a good as thing, because I dont need to worry at all  anymore. Experience hasn't really changed my look at the person. It has just opened my mind to a whole new world for me. Its AWESOME!.

To love someone, it really is a challenge. To find that person you love and not let them go is an accomplishment that is waiting to happen. Having an open mind I think helps. Also knowing that those you love are worth it in every way possible, that is something I love to do. Those I trust and know will always be there for me. I love them whether they aren't what people expect or whether they are someone everyone hates, I dont know why but its just how I am. People treat me differently and I'm used to that. So other people who assume they know a person. Cant really know them unless they have seen them in action so to speak.

What I find upsetting is the fact that I have feelings for someone. And I dont know what to do with them. Coz its a complicated situation.

Beginning of a New Era for Jac

Well thought Id start this blog to keep my mind occupied instead of going over things that have happened, wont happen, and may happen. Its been a while since I have really blogged about my life and well last time wasn't too interesting to be honest. A whole lot of me going all emo and asking why this and that. Not a good read thats for sure.

This blog is going to just reflect on things I cant really tell anyone else to be honest.

Where should I start? Asking myself questions already. How about I start with the first thing that comes to me.....

Okie here it goes. I have officially withdrawn from Early Childhood this semester as I wasn't getting much from it. I'm glad that I did it. But haven't told my parents yet as would like to have everything verified about whether or not I can start next semester, as well as get the scholarship I was offered. It was stressful as and the lady who does the withdrawing process, was a very determined person who insisted I try to stay and see how things go. I had made my mind up by then and knew I would be walking out of the office with head held high and having confidence in my choice. Crazily enough it all went to plan and I walked out smiling. I do how ever have to go for a chat with the head of Early Childhood and then see what happens from there. God its going to be tough to tell my parents. I hope this works though. I really do want to achieve this and become someone who has a job. I want to be independent.

Making the decision was harder than I thought but I felt it was the right choice. I'm hoping it will benefit me in some way. I am just hoping to get it over and done with and then just get ready for next semester. Its rough though, I haven't told my parents yet. They still think I am going to school. Wishing I had told them earlier but its too late now. I will have to grow some balls and deal with whatever they say. I know it sounds stupid but I just can tell them aye.. I get real iffy bout it. I dont like talking to my parents. One thing I hate to do. Hanging out with them is fine. Talking to them about things is a whole different level right there.

I wander what they will say...